New Orleans City Guide Awesomeness
The food? Holy moly.
The people? Friendly.
The sights? Insightful.
The music? Hell, yes.
My tips about food and stuff to do? Below.
General Tips
- Stay in the French Quarter with the rest of the tourists.
- Public transportation is pretty useful. New Orleans has quaint historic streetcars like San Francisco, except with less stinky people. San Francisco bought a couple from New Orleans, actually. Use Google Maps directions and select the “transit” option to see if the streetcar is a viable option.
- Use Google Street View to decide if you want to walk around the neighborhood you’re thinking about going to, or if you’ll cab it. If the neighborhood looks shitty, it is. Things can change pretty quickly when you leave the French Quarter.
- People are generally much friendlier than they are in other cities. Feel free to ask locals in cool stores for non-touristy recommendations. They’ll be excited to tell you about local stuff you wouldn’t have found otherwise.
- Other tips are below, so keep reading, traveler. Huh.
Food
If you are just a little careful about it over the course of a week–with only one or two exceptions–you can eat something BLOW YOU AWAY good with EVERY meal. Over and over, you’ll exclaim “That’s one of the best things I’ve ever eaten.” Plus, the smells… Just walking down the street you’ll smell the most amazing food. Yelp.com is your friend in NOLA. Don’t eat anywhere with fewer than 4 stars.
Commander’s Palace in the Garden District
This place reminded me of the kind of high-end dining found in Kevin Spacey’s Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil. You enter and four waiters with towels over their arms rush over to line up and say hello to you. Later, I asked where the restroom was, and was escorted to it, even though pointing would have sufficed. When your food arrives it’s brought by the same number of people you have at your table. Four guests, four servers. Why? So everyone gets their food at exactly the same choreographed moment. It’s service the like of which you’ve never had if you don’t go to places like French Laundry.
The food is out of this world. The steak could be cut with two fingers and the weight of the knife—not even a good knife. The Bread Pudding Soufflé, one of the best desserts I’ve ever had to stuff down because I was so damn full, is seriously old school.
It’s very inexpensive compared to what it would cost here in San Francisco. Jackets are preferred and a collared shirt and closed-toed shoes are required, you classy son of a bitch.
Jacques Imo’s
This place is famous for their Alligator Cheesecake. It’s not intended as a dessert, and is served hot. It’s kind of a cross between a cheesecake and a quiche. When I took my first bite, I scowled and said “That’s just stupid good.”
It’s also in a cool little neighborhood that you wouldn’t see otherwise.
http://www.yelp.com/biz/jacques-imos-cafe-new-orleans
Willie Mae’s Scotch House
This place is supposed to have the best fried chicken in the whole world. The chicken isn’t breaded like most fried chicken. It’s dipped in a batter and then thrown in the fryer. Yes, it lives up to the hype. I went twice. The original Treme restaurant closed after a fire in 2023, and Willie Mae’s is now at 898 Baronne St downtown.
Here’s Anthony Bourdain visiting.
Don’t go to NOLA and not eat this chicken. You will be sad and you should be.
They’re also famous for their red beans and rice, but I asked our server and he liked the butter beans better. BUTTER BEANS BETTER. I had them both, and yes. Butter beans.
Their St. Charles Avenue location is in a much better neighborhood. I showed up in the middle of the afternoon and had no trouble getting a seat, but the chicken wasn’t as good. That location does have the benefit of a gorgeous ride on the historic streetcar through the Garden District, past Loyola and Tulane University, which are attractions in their own right.
Link:
Coops
Jambalaya. Seriously. It’s fucking amazing. You want the big one. I forget what they call it, but it’s got more stuff in it and is better. For a place called Coops, the fried chicken sucked. It was so dry I sent it back. The replacement was not much better. Repeat after me: Jambalaya.
The waiter was surly and hilarious. My friend Michelle tried to order a Coke. He said, “No, I’m bringing you a beer.”
Here’s Hannibal Buress (the comedian) talking about Coops. I’m positive he had our same waiter.
13 on Frenchmen (used to be 13 Monaghan)
One trick is to ask locals in cool stores for non-touristy recommendations. They’ll be excited to tell you about local stuff you wouldn’t have found otherwise. More than one local told me we had to go to this little bar with TACHOS. Tater Tot Nachos. Need I say more? It’s in the Frenchmen Street area. The chef is a crazy kook who will be very happy to regale you with stories of his days as a circus freak, especially if you tell him you’re from SF.
http://www.yelp.com/biz/13-monaghan-new-orleans
Popeye’s
No shit. One of our tour guides told us that the Popeye’s Chicken is different in Louisiana. He said, “I would never tell you to go to New Orleans and go to Popeyes… BUT, it is different here. Not the same…” He just let that hang. That shifty sonofa recommended without recommending. Well, you’ve had Popeye’s, right? It’s pretty good, right? Well, in Louisiana it’s spicier and… better. If you’re in a hurry, duck in. Totally worth it. I wish all Popeye’s were like this.
Fun Doings
Steamboat
Cheesy, but fun. Takes you up and down the river and points out cool stuff on the way. DO NOT get the meal. It’s total crap, and you miss all the cool stuff because you’re inside eating like a tool instead of hanging outside and exploring the engine room. It’s a real steamboat, as the captain will probably point out over the loudspeaker, like, one-million times. There is another crappier boat, so make sure you take the right one.
https://www.steamboatnatchez.com/
Bourbon Street
You just have to. The streets close every night and it’s a big party. This is where all of the awesome Mardi Gras party happens. It’s like the Castro on Halloween used to be, except friendlier. Must be (or get) drunk to fully appreciate. Totally cool to drink on the street or order your drink to go. Yes, “to go” is an option at the bars.
Frenchmen Street
It’s basically a Bourbon street for people in their 30s+. Super fun. Every bar has great live music and most bars have little food stands in the back. You will want to go here more than one night.
Here is a map, linked to the cool blocks.
Walking Tours
Walking tours are totally fun, and you get to learn a lot. It does matter what company you go with, though. Do the ghost tour and the cemetery tours. Don’t do the Vampire Tours or other gimmicky ones. This one is supposed to be the best, by far:
https://hauntedhistorytours.com/
The National WWII Museum
My friend Doug is a WWII aficionado. If Doug visited this museum, Doug would shit his pants. It’s really, really cool to walk around and see all of the old stuff and listen to the recordings of the guys who were there. I went to see the Tom Hanks-produced movie, but it was just eh. I’d say pass on the movie, but the Museum is really, super cool.
https://www.nationalww2museum.org/
Bus Tour
Normally, I’m against this kind of thing. But there’s so much to see, and it’s a pretty big city. There are neighborhoods you’d never go to without the bus. It’s sobering to drive through empty neighborhoods that were 9 feet underwater. Plus, there are so many other great neighborhoods to look at. I don’t remember the name of the tour company. Our guide was all right, but he did personally deliver my friend’s iPhone to our hotel after she left it on the bus.
Preservation Hall
Tiny historic room with some of the best musicians who ever walked the earth. It’s one of those don’t miss places. $15 for standing ticket. $30-$40 for sitting on a bench in the first two rows. Seems the way to go is to spend the extra cash instead of getting squished. Show is 60 minutes, and then out you go! But, out you go impressed and happy.
http://www.yelp.com/biz/preservation-hall-new-orleans-2